This Is A Journey

This morning for breakfast I had two slices of that cinnamon raisin bread and a huge mug of coffee with soymilk. Another day, another step in the journey.

I have to tell you, I was not happy with what I ate for the remainder of yesterday. It’s just so frustrating because every day I eat at least three days’ worth of food- around 4,000 calories- and yet I DON’T GAIN WEIGHT. My stomach has extra fatness, and I’m a bit bloated, yet I’m not gaining at the rate I should be, when I calculate it. If an extra 3,500 calories equals a pound, then I should weigh so much right now.

I don’t want to gain weight and that’s not my goal at all- in fact, I’d love to lose weight- but I’m just so confused… maybe if eating too much made me gain weight, I’d be motivated to eat more healthily. But I’m afraid if I eat less, if I eat the recommended 2000-2500 calories per day, I’ll lose weight or binge. It’s so frustrating. Basically I’m just a whiny lil’ unthankful bitch.

OUT OF RESPECT FOR THE KING OF INFOMERCIALS I ASK YOU TO PRESS CAPS LOCK AND KEEP IT ON FOR THE REST OF THE DAY. REST IN PEACE BILLY MAYS.

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